It is written by a mother of teenage boys (and 1 girl) and is meant as a warning for teenage girls not to post photographs of a more 'sexual' nature online because (quote):
"I know your family would not be thrilled at the thought of my teenage boys seeing you only in your towel. Did you know that once a male sees you in a state of undress, he can’t quickly un-see it? You don’t want our boys to only think of you in this sexual way, do you?"
I think she has a point. I would not be happy if my teenage girl posted pictures of herself in a state of undress on the world wide web and I also think teenage girls often don't realise what they do and what the consequences can be. Where does that snapshot end up? Will you ever be able to delete it once it has entered the virtual network? etc etc
But there is also another side to this, another way to look at it, and I also agree with that.
On 4 kids, a suitcase and a beagle, http://shamozal.blogspot.in/2013/09/fyi-if-youre-teenage-boys-mum.html?spref=fb Kirsty writes about the fact that teenage boys should learn to look at girls with respect.
"I want/need my boys to know that this is okay. That women are as free to see as many men as they like. That equality means there are no double standards. Women are not to be judged by their purity."
and
"It was possibly this that disturbed me (and the fact that Mrs Hall's original post had her sons half naked in board shorts at the beach - it was okay for them to be half naked):
There are boys out there waiting and hoping for women of character. Some young men are fighting the daily uphill battle to keep their minds pure, and their thoughts praiseworthy – just like you.I have two girls and two boys. I talk to them both in exactly the same way about online behaviour. And I talk to them in exactly the same way about social behaviour. Their thoughts are their own. But if I ever hear them judge a woman on the length of the skirt or the fact that's she's posted a picture of herself in a towel on the internet THEN I will be truly disappointed.
I'm pretty sure that by the time my boys are in the height of their hormonal teenage-hood, there will be absolutely nothing I will be able to do to make "their minds pure". What I can do though, is teach them not to judge."
Two opinions that I both agree with, is that possible?
I do frown sometimes when I see the photographs some girls put on Facebook. They are pretty and have beautiful bodies, but the way they pose disturbs me sometimes. The sexual connotation it has makes me wonder who they post it for and why. What is their aim? Probably just to show their beauty and they have every right to do so I guess.
I think it makes me frown because I am a frumpy, middle aged, mother and I can see how it will embarrass these girls to stumble upon those photos when they are older/wiser/more mature and mothers of teenage girls themselves.
As far as I can tell my teenage boys are not that impressed by those photographs (yet), but should I block the girls that post them from my boys FB accounts? Is that the way to "keep their minds pure"? I don't think so. I think I should teach them how to deal with it, teach them those pictures are not the norm, like pictures in magazines are not the norm and like porn is not the norm. I don't think keeping them away from it (if that is even possible) will keep their minds pure. If anything it will fuel the idea that it is exiting. Forbidden fruits are all the more attractive aren't they?
There was one more post about posting photographs and this one shows that it are not just teenage girls that do it. I had to laugh about this one on Woog's World: http://www.woogsworld.com/2013/09/here-is-photo-of-my-penis-guide-to.html
My only problem now is to figure out a way to have a serious conversation about this with my boys. They usually run away, totally embarrassed, when I broach on any topic of a sexual nature......
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